I just have one of those feelings, where I'm so annoyed, that I have to write so fast, that my keyboard is on fire, and my hands will spontaneously combust into dust, and I'll have to get replacement limbs from the dollar store!
(Then proceeds to procrastinate on this post for an hour...)
So, I was on Quora, and I saw this question being asked.
"This straight wife was used and then murdered. Would you agree closeted gay men who marry women to hide their sexuality have no regard for the women they marry?" (Eventually the question was changed to "Some closeted men", which sounds a whole lot better.)
Link (The article)
I totally disagree with what you’re saying! Every person is different, so you can’t judge a person based off a similar event! This is why it drives me crazy when people just assume something for a whole group of people, Judge the person based off who they are, rather than what, they are.
What happened to that poor girl is terrible, and that guy is a nut-job! Nut-jobs are not defined by sexuality, and most of them are straight anyway. Did you hear about that dude who killed his whole family to be with some girl! (He was freaking gorgeous, I will admit. Why are all the hot guys taken, or serial killers! So typical! lol jk.)
There are plenty of women who married gay men unknowingly, who turned out alright... Which is as follows..
Not So Love Stories
¤ Let’s take Fran Drescher, she married a man when they were rather young. They broke up because her now ex husband, realized he was gay. This was over 20 years ago, and they’re still good friends to this day. They even made a show out of it called Happily Divorced. The characters divorce, but they still live together and go on dates with men. (I don’t remember for sure, it’s been a while)
¤ Another example, is a more personal one. One of my managers from when I was in retail had the same thing happen to her! They had married, and when she was 3 months pregnant, her now ex realized he was gay. They did divorce, but they’re to this day, still best friends. He has a guy now, the sons best friend is gay, and she remarried (To this jerk, that she recently divorced, thank goodness, what an asshole! lol).Funny thing though is, I realized she has no gay-dar whatsoever (Everyone else in the store figured out I was gay, except for her. lol) . So this could be a theme, that girls don’t know the guy is gay in the first place. (When I say that, I mean they are completely clueless to hints, such as a guy drooling over a half naked man, or something of the sort.) Obviously, things are changing since I've had crushes on feminine straight men before. So there’s not always a gay/straight/bi mold. But sometimes, you just know, or are completely clueless of someone’s sexuality.
The creator of the post responded to me, and said this.
"The link you shared about the man who killed his pregnant wife and his children his name is Chris Watts he was also having a homosexual affair at the time he murdered his whole family. This only furthers my claim that women are used and abused by some with an agenda."
(I found a link about it here. link )
This, is the part that annoys me so much.
First off, what agenda? What does that even mean? Are gay men trying to marry straight women so they can show off their amazing leg muscles, and act more superior? Are they trying to shove crocs in our faces?! Is that the agenda? The CROC AGENDA!! (I knew I couldn't trust them!! jk)
I'd like to point something about the original article, with the main who killed the wife, to collect the insurance money, and be with a dude he met on Grindr. He killed her for the insurance money. However, this happens to everyone. In fact, that old Halloween myth about kids needing to be careful about poison in candy. It had to do with a man who killed his son by letting him have poison treats, just so he could collect his child's life insurance policy. Link
There are plenty of stories of straight men killing their wives, as well as themselves in some cases. The interesting thing I find, is when I looked up "Man kills wife", I found various stories of different straight men killing their wives. Link 1 Link 2 Link 3
I also knew someone who was killed, because her husband was jealous that she liked her job, and thought she was having an affair. Link 10
I also knew someone who was killed, because her husband was jealous that she liked her job, and thought she was having an affair. Link 10
But when I typed in gay man kills wife, I found almost the same stories about either the dude who killed his wife for the insurance money, or the other guy who killed his wife & kids, and was having an affair with a man, and a woman. Link 4 Link 5. As well as a terrible story about a dad who killed his wife, and his son for being gay (The son was gay, not the wife). Link 6
Which leads me to my next point.
The reason why so many closeted gay people marry women, Is literally for the exact reason that poor guy was killed in Link 6, for being gay. For decades, centuries even, homosexuality has been frowned upon. On a daily basis, people are fired from jobs, bullied, beaten, kicked out, and even killed for being gay. Because of all the hate, and intolerance, many LGBT people are SUICIDAL! So many LGBT people take their lives every year because they can't take the hate they get from friends, family, and other people in their lives. LGB youth are 5 TIMES more likely to commit suicide than their straight peers. As well as 40% of Transgendered youth have considered/attempted suicide. Source
So with that being said, many closet cases could have a good reason to be in the closet, and marry a woman. They are afraid that their family will hate, or even try to hurt, or kill them, if they even say the word gay, let alone say they identify as it. Do I think they should marry a woman? No. Do I think they should tell the woman that he's gay, and just needs to make it look like he's straight? Only if she's okay with gay people, because if she's not, he'd probably just get outed by her, and she could be a dick about everything.
So with that being said, many closet cases could have a good reason to be in the closet, and marry a woman. They are afraid that their family will hate, or even try to hurt, or kill them, if they even say the word gay, let alone say they identify as it. Do I think they should marry a woman? No. Do I think they should tell the woman that he's gay, and just needs to make it look like he's straight? Only if she's okay with gay people, because if she's not, he'd probably just get outed by her, and she could be a dick about everything.
The Trevor Project & The Try Guys team up.
¤ I'd also like to mention a friend of mine. My friend, T, was with a man for years and years, they had three kids. She always suspected he was gay, but to this day, she doesn't know if he is or not. (She said that he was never really interested in sex, and one time he went on a "boating trip" with a friend and she found blood on his pants, she thought maybe he had anal, and that happened in the process) They eventually divorced, and now she got married to a new man (Whom she is now also divorced from lol).
Anyways, one time T told me that if her ex is gay, his dad would probably kill him.
So this, once again, is another personal story. Where, although all speculation. It could be something serious, this man could be so afraid of his dad, or family, that he might be refusing to tell anyone, who he really is. (If he's actually gay/bi.)
Anyways, one time T told me that if her ex is gay, his dad would probably kill him.
So this, once again, is another personal story. Where, although all speculation. It could be something serious, this man could be so afraid of his dad, or family, that he might be refusing to tell anyone, who he really is. (If he's actually gay/bi.)
The fact of the matter is, every story is different, every person is different. We can't judge every person in a similar situation, just because of one asshole! My friend Stephanie, broke her leg on a trampoline once. But you don't see her running around town screaming at people, saying not to go on trampolines, or you'll break your leg! (That would be kind of funny though.)
