Thursday, October 30, 2014

Happy Halloween!

Today was a busy day for me, and since I haven't finished any of my posts on the back burner, I'll just post some Halloween images I made! I may post something else later in the week though.







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Thursday, October 23, 2014

My favorite anime ships

This is a post about my favorite ships, when I say that, I don't mean pirate ships!
 For those who don't know, a "ship" is when you pair two characters in a romantic relationship, and want to see them together as a couple. So like if you like character A, and you think that their friendship with character B is, "more than just a friendship", you can board the ship and hope that they end up together. This can lead to fan fiction, and fan images, it can be really fun to get into. Sites like tumblr, or fanfiction.net are great places to look for nice things that relate with your ship!

Not to be confused with a pirate ship!


The first ship I really got into is a weird one, It involves two characters from the anime Bleach.

 Ichigo, the main character, and an enemy known as Grimmjow.

I just came across a picture of them, and I thought they would make a cute couple! The interesting thing is, they do have some similarities, which could lead in a good reason for them to get together. I haven't seen Bleach for quite some time, but I remember they both had similar personality traits, like being hot headed, and never giving up. The best couples are the ones that are similar to each other!

I originally had a bunch of pictures posted of the two, but I don't want to get sued for copyright infringement, so unfortunately I took them down. Which kind of ruins the aesthetic of the post.

My next pairing is from the anime Angel Beats, with main character Otonashi, and another character named Naoi. In the anime, Naoi is very affectionate towards Otonashi, and is always there for him. I always thought they would be cute together!

My next ship is from the anime Free! Free!, is a homo-erotic anime about swimming. it's heavily hinted that the characters like each other more than just friends, and one of the creators even made a post on twitter about one of the characters being the other characters "other half".

Haru x Makoto, they've known each other since they were little. In the end of season 2, they even have a fight, and other characters act like they're as if they are a married couple that just got into a fight. In the end of the anime they go off together to another city.

Rei X Nagisa, Nagisa being my favorite character in Free! Nagisa continuously went to Rei and asked him to join their swim club.






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Thursday, October 16, 2014

RE: My life: What is going on?

A year ago I made a post called My Life: What is going on?! As seen here.

(A drawing I made of my friend Jennie, as an adventurer, looking for her mummy!)


I'd like to update.



Even though my life has been spiraling out of control, it's not all that bad. Even though I got an associates in Graphic Design, it has been a useless degree, however there was a lawsuit with my college, and I am actually getting a nice chunk of money to help pay off my loans! I won't have to worry about getting a good job for a while to help pay the loans, not that I shouldn't get a good job, I still will!

While I still do work in retail, I was put in a different position that made the job less of a nightmare.
I am however, planning on leaving for a much more suitable office job once I get my driver's license. The ironic part is, I've hated retail so much that it has inspired me to get my license. The problem was, there are no office jobs where the bus can take me.

It's really funny, even though my life was and still does spiral out of control, what they say is true. It does get better! I know that my life has been a wreck for a while, but I know the pieces of the puzzle are starting to go into place. Everything will make sense soon enough, and it will all work out in the end.

Picture by me

I made this post in order to shed some light, things don't always go as planned. But it does get better and you have to work hard so it can get better, you can't always let life push you around! Don't let people take advantage of you, sometimes you do need to be selfish, you have to grab life by the balls and tell it that you're going to change things for yourself! It is about time that you do something that will benefit you and that will help you go to a better place in your life!

Life can and will always get better! But you have to make sure that you're trying to make it better too! Sitting around like a smelly slug won't help!

Most importantly! We must remember to enjoy ourselves!



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Thursday, October 9, 2014

Life as a loner

Today's post is about my life, as a loner, or a hermit. In Japan, hermits are sometimes known as "Hikkimori". The more you know....ordidn'tcaretoknow.

A Hermit is someone who tends to stay in his or her room/house all day, every day and does not really socialize at all or just rarely.
I am a Hermit/Loner, because I just go to work, come home, and just hang out at my house. Every now and again I go out with my friends, but usually only once every three months, I just don't get out much...
I'm mainly a loner because society has rejected me, even though I do want a social life. My shyness and introverted nature has lead me to not get out much at all, and without most people really lending a helping hand, I've been isolated from social interaction for most of my life.
It's really funny though, because everyone always says I am very cool to be around, I bring a smile on people's faces, and I'm devastatingly beautiful! :P But, at the same time, no one has time for me. It's kind of ironic and weird..

Me, the lone flower.

I didn't choose the hermit life, the hermit life chose me! You see, I've always been shy my entire life. Being shy has lead me to not really have friends growing up, a non existent love life, and being socially awkward to the point that I don't always know what I am supposed to do or say when in a social situations.
When I went to school, I would get bullied, and I only had two friends. I didn't see my friends as much after the 4th grade, since I was left back because I had hearing problems, and then went to another school in the 5th grade. In the 6th grade, I moved and I didn't see my friends anymore. It was a whole new ball park, and I ended up making acquaintances. I will say I made more conversation with people in Middle, and Highschool, than in lower grades.

 (I also went to catholic school from grade K-4th, and the students, and teachers were all assholes. I'd never recommend a catholic school EVER, they were mentally abusive! The only people that were nice to me, were my friends.)

 The kids in middle school I would sometimes talk to, and by the time I was in my last year in high school, I was a ghost because all of the people I talked to were older than me and left. I just went to school and that was it... (On a side note, no one even thought I was a senior. One kid freaked out that I was a senior, because I always look younger than I am! lol)
The kids I "befriended" in highschool, were just people I talked to while the classes were going. I hadn't actually hang out with any of them, or anything. There's only one person from HS that will message me on facebook sometimes! He's the closest thing to a friend I had in that school. (I did become friends with someone in college, who  went to the same schools, but we didn't know each other yet, so I won't count her in this part.)

By the time I went to college, I didn't have any real friends. I never hung out with anyone before and I had never had a sleep over or anything. I said that I made acquaintances in high school is because that's what they were, they didn't care enough about me to really get to know me, no one asked me to hang out with them or anything. I was always so shy, that I could never make friends that would stick around. There was one person that actually came over my house, but he was just using me. He would torment me at my house, and then he borrowed a game from me and never gave it back. In which he moved afterwards. (You can see that game, and post here) The only friends I truly had were video games, which is why I've always loved them. I was always quickly immersed in another world with a reality much different than my own, filled with adventures and interesting characters. It was to the extent that I saw the characters as my own friends! You never have to worry about fighting with them, or them abandoning you, they're always there for you. Video games were there for me, when real friends were non existent...

Of course, I did make a few true friends online.

It wasn't until my last year of college that I actually made some real friends. The last year of college that I had, I finally did make friends. It was all because I added someone from high school on facebook, they told me to meet them at college because she was also going there. I finally made friends just because of one facebook add! I became friends with her, and everyone else that was in our little group, it wasn't until then that I met some really good people that for once actually stuck around!
I know that must be depressing, but I think it's a good thing. No matter what your situation, you will always meet the right people eventually! Sometimes it's also good to have courage and do something out of your element as well, even if you make one friend, they can open up a world of endless possibilities!
Check out an older post I made about friendship here.

On a weird note, something that seems to happen to me a whole lot is the fact that whenever I make plans, they always go wrong. It's almost like I'm an anime character, one who is just really awkward and things just don't always go the way they should! Such as Tomoko from the anime Watamote!

1. For my last birthday 12/20/2013, I invited a few of my friends to go out on the town with me. About 7 or 8 of them. What ended up happening was, none of them could make it except for three people and two of them were unavailable until like 9pm. I got to spend time with one of my friends for most of the day, which was nice of course, but I wanted to spend time with everyone together...
2. One time I invited a couple of my friends to a magic fair, two of them couldn't make it and everyone  lse canceled except my one friend.
3. I tried inviting my friends to a game of Trivia months later, but that never happened because one of my friends didn't respond for hours because of her terrible phone service. (Although, it was a last minute thing)
4. Another time, I invited 5 of my friends to hang out with us and go to some cool magic stores. Two couldn't make it, and one of them was only able to chill for 2 hours.
5. I wanted to see a movie, and that never happened because my friend went with her other friends. She didn't want to see it, because she wanted to see it with me. But they wanted to see it too. Then I tried making plans with her, but things didn't work out. (It was Guardians of the Galaxy, which as of 2018, I have still not seen it. My friend also moved to another country too. lol [We still talk])
It seems like the universe does not want me to get to enjoy being around the friends that I've made in the last 4 years.
Not to say that every plan has backfired, the only ones that went well were in fact...the ones I did not plan....
Let's all be a loner on a tropical island!

What's even worse is that it's almost like no one has time for me, everyone has their other friends that they would probably prefer to hang out with. I'm new to having real friends, so I don't know how everything works, which also leads to other social awkward things that happen to me. (Also never knowing what to say, or how to start conversations sometimes can get to me)
It's weird, it's like I finally have friends, but everything that could go wrong, goes wrong!
I know my friends are there for me, I just need to figure out how it all works out.

It seems like everyone always chooses someone else over me too..
There have been plenty of times people would tell me they would do something with me, and then end up forgetting entirely and act like they never even  asked. I made a blog post about that, so if you want to read that.. click this.

Due to the fact that I have always been shy, and I never went out to hang with anyone..Also the fact that I am a late bloomer when it comes to my own sexuality. (I was 19 when I realized I was attracted to men). I've also never been in a romantic relationship before.. NOT EVER... I've never been kissed or anything. I am going to be 25 in December of 2014 and I've never had a boyfriend...
Now normally I don't have a problem with this, but sometimes something happens and it just gets to me. Like everyone around me, let's say they've been places (Like the garage! jk).. and my one friend is basically the reincarnation of Blanche Devereaux from the Golden Girls. He's bi too so it's even more wild. I also have a friend who is a few years younger than me, and she has a boyfriend and she lost her V card recently. Although I didn't know this, I just thought it was cool that I wasn't the only one who has never been with anyone. But now that I'm alone on that boat again, it just bothered me for a bit, even though it shouldn't bother me because it never usually does. The only reason why it bothers me is because of how society views sexual behavior, something that I never care about is how society sees me. Yet, I let society get to me, and also that kid in high school who said I would end up being the 60 year old virgin.

 (Actually, I ended up making a friend in 2016, who is two years younger than me, and still a virgin. He will most likely stay one, as he doesn't experience much sexual desire. )

But I got so upset that I was older than a good portion of my friends, and they've played the devils tango already! It just got to me, even though it shouldn't get to me at all, I never care about society and how it views things... but every now and again, there's a crack in the surface.

My one friend who is older than me, told me that she was 26, and that I shouldn't worry. Which definitely helped, but what bothered me even more is that I let this get to my head. I don't care about silly things like that, and it got to me anyways. But you know what, sometimes things do get by and affect you, but you just have to get back up and stay strong.

If you've ever seen the anime called "Watamote", that is basically my life. Watamote is about a girl named Tomoko, she is a high schooler. Tomoko is incredibly shy, she has no friends and she just sits around in her room playing video games, watching anime, reading manga and other things like surfing the net.
Many people actually relate to this anime, so I would assume I am not the only one.

I feel like my shyness has made me a hermit.. but at the same time, I feel like no one has time for me... So it's almost like I'm supposed to be a hermit forever, but at the same time, I know things can get better, and that they will. I think my being a late bloomer also has something to do with it, I haven't yet experienced what other people have, but I know I can, soon.

Even though this post has been a downer, I don't want anyone thinking it really is that much of one. When I first created this post, I was down. However, I am not anymore. I wanted to make this post to show other people my experiences, as well as show people with similar situations that they are not alone, as well as tell people that it can always get better! Sometimes you do need to get out of your comfort zone too, (Working in retail can actually help make you more outgoing as well).
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Thursday, October 2, 2014

Why I dislike popular things

Something I've noticed is, I usually don't like popular things. Call me a hipster all you like, but I just don't find interest in many popular games, or shows. I also don't think it's cool how popular media steals so much of the spotlight (But I guess at the same time, if something else took it's place it would be popular instead).
People's favorite anime tend to be the really popular anime like Death Note, or Sword Art Online, and stores will milk these franchises to the bone. People will talk about it non-stop. That's alright to sell merchandise, and love a particular form of media, but I just find that the non-popular video games, anime and other media tend to actually be 10 times better than the most popular entertainment franchises.
The annoying thing is, I can get merchandise of stuff I don't like, up the wazoo. But anything I do like, there's almost nothing for. You can have tons of Super Mario items, but not a single Kya Dark Lineage item, for example. There are fans for everything, but fans of certain things get gypped because they like something that is not popular enough to merit some cool merchandise for the fans! The sad thing, is that with unpopular shows or games, you don't always get cool merchandise for that show or game.
 On the other hand, there are popular forms that I do like, for example, I find that Madoka Magica was a very well written anime with a plot twist in every episode. But I find that the best programs and games are the ones that aren't as well known, such as Shangri-La , Hatenkou Yuugi, Suikoden or Kya Dark Lineage for example are all amazing anime, or games, that no one knows about!

Meanwhile, there are other things that are milked like no tomorrow, and come out with the same boring story, and characters. They're the most popular thing in the world, and I have no idea why! (My example is Final Fantasy VII, I hated Final Fantasy 7, I thought it was the most boring game ever, but everyone and their mother loves it!)

This also includes anime, especially anime with many episodes such as Bleach or One Piece get milked with over 1000 episodes. The shows I'd love to see just a second season for, will never see the light of day again!
It's funny, because I remember someone once saying that the anime with lot's of episodes are "bad", and the anime with a small amount of episodes are "good". It's reverse for places such as America, where shows with a short amount of episodes are "Bad" and the shows with lot's of episodes are "Good". A sneak peak at cultural differences.


"Originally, I had posted an image of Cloud, from Final Fantasy VII, saying "I'm not a WHORE! Cuz whores get paid n stuff!" (I don't know who made it, nor do I have permission to post it, so I took it down)

I also hate it when people are like 

"OMG THIS IS LIEK THE BEST GAEM EVAR!! IF U DNT LIKE IT, YOU HAVE NO SOUL, K!LL URSELF!"

to a popular game....


My instance this time, is Legend of Zelda. I played I think LOZ Seasons for the gameboy, once a long time ago and I didn't care for it. I am interested in getting into the series however, but there was something that bothered me once. Someone said that they "hate it when a hardcore gamer has never played Legend of Zelda before." I am a hardcore gamer, and I mostly play RPG's. I also only grew up with Playstation games, so I find this statement to be just flat out rude, and kind of ignorant. People like what they like, and there is also the fact that sometimes you don't have money for certain things. But that is like if I said the same statement about the Suikoden series, it's my favorite series and in my opinion the best game/s of all time. But I wouldn't say something as rude as the above quote, not everyone is going to like something, or be interested in it, and all because you like something doesn't mean other people have to play it.

 It is just not cool when people push their opinions as a fact.

(Side Note: I got to play Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild, in 2018. It's by far, an amazing game. So yeah..)


Another thing that really bugs me is, all of the tv shows that I like get canceled! Shows that I really enjoyed shows such as Happy endings, and Pushing Daisies, I also liked Sean Saves the World...
Two other shows, Mystery Girls and the Mysteries of Laura, I like, but everyone seems to hate them!
The reason why I don't really watch television anymore, is because most of the shows I liked get canceled! It's like, why even bother investing time in them then?!

This ESPECIALLY applies to characters as well! There are plenty of characters that I absolutely LOVE! But everyone hates! Examples are Quina from Final Fantasy IX, Orihime from Bleach and
As much as I love these characters from popular franchises, they are very hated within the community. Orihime is actually on Anime-Planet's top 10 hated characters! (As of 2019, she is 16th on the list)


Quina



I know I must have been a little ironic, and contradictory, but what I was trying to get to is, I just feel like popular shows and games aren't always what they are cracked up to be. While other times they are popular for a really good reason! But I also find myself usually enjoying media that is not well known, and I think people should invest more time and effort in the things that aren't as known.
It also bothers me to see everyone talk about all of the popular things, and never the shows or games that aren't as popular. I have a friend who has mostly only seen anime that is popular, and I am helping her by recommending anime that aren't well known that I have seen.
I notice on anime sites all anyone can ever talk about is popular anime.. but it's just like, where is all of the talk for other anime?!

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