I am an emotional sponge

This is from a question a formspring person asked\ "Does someone's mood affect your own mood?"

Image by me

My response is, YES I am an emotional sponge. If someone is down, it's possible that their emotions will bring me down.

This happened one time last March at work. We had this girl, we'll call her "Madame Marsha". The lovely Madame Marsha was called to the office, and was having an argument with the store manager.

The store manager and Madame Marsha were arguing in the hallway outside of the managers office, this was because the store manager was about to leave to go home. All the managers were there because of what Madame Marsha had done, it was like an investigation.
So, the the manager, and Marsha are yelling at each other in the hallway. The other managers just had that face on, of when people are yelling at each other. The supervisor Laura, and I open the door to the hallway to see this heated argument..
One second in that hallway, and you could feel the tension. I was thinking to myself, I cannot be here, because negative things affect me drastically! In my head I'm saying to the supervisor, "Laura.. I can't be here.. let's go let's go!". Of course Laura just had to sit there with the other managers... lol
We had to go to the cash room, which is across the hall from the manager's office. But Laura had to stay for the spectacle, but I just wanted to go to the cash office, finish counting the money from being on register, and get going.

I just really wanted to be away from this mess! I KNEW it was going to affect me later, it always does, even if it doesn't affect me personally, the negativity will affect me anyways.

For the rest of the day I felt like crap, I just had this horrible feeling. Even though I had nothing to do with the argument, the tension, and everything affected me.

Funny thing though, I recently just found out I am a "Psychic Vampire".
Well, guess what a Psychic Vampire is? It's someone who can give or take away someone's energy.
So, that means subconsciously I take people's energy.
So, that day with the argument, there was so much tension and negative energy and I was taking it all in unconsciously and that was why I felt like crap the rest of the night... I took all of their negative energy from them.
Although I didn't know I was a psychic Vampire back then, I still knew it would have a negative affect on me.

News Flash from 2019, I'm not a Psychic Vampire, Psychic vampires are bad. I'm an Empath, which is the ability to "feel", what others are feeling. 

The Lost Files: Chrono Cross

Chrono Cross is one of my most favorite video games of all time, even almost 20 years later, as I edit this in 2019. CC is still an all time fave of mine!

I always played my favorite video games every now and again, at least once a year. Games like Suikoden, Kya, Soul Nomad, Sly Cooper etc... But I have not played Chrono Cross for about 6-7 years! (From 2013)

The reason why I haven't played it, is a peculiar one. Chrono Cross comes with two discs, and once you get to a certain part in the game, it asks you to use disc 2 to continue the game.

Back in 2006, my friend, and his brother were over my house. We had been playing Chrono Cross, and I left the disc on top of my Playstation 2. Before they left my house, I noticed the disc was gone! I asked if anyone knew where it was, and they said they did not know.

For years, I wondered what happened to it. At one point, I thought maybe one of them stole it. But your friends stealing something that belongs to you, was just not the right way of thinking! So I always trashed that thought.

I had also lost two other games, at two other unrelated times. One actually a year earlier in 2005, but eventually I found both of  those games, albeit years later. (I had lost my copy of Breath of Fire II, and Champions: Return to Arms. Both of those games, were found in a random pile of junk in my room lol. My mom must have found them, and put them somewhere else).

Drawing of Kid, from Chrono Cross.

A few weeks ago (2013) I cleared out the last place the disc could have been.
So the disc is just gone, and there is no way of finding it now... it's just gone! My first suspicion of my friend stealing it becomes a bit more real, and I'll tell you why.

There was a motive.

When I first got Chrono Cross, I showed it to my friends, and they enjoyed the game so much, they also obtained a copy. But their copy would mess up on certain parts, and wouldn't play properly.
Perhaps my friend, or his brother stole the disc so they could play it again? I was 16 in 2006, my friends were a little bit younger than me, so they had to be 14-12-ish. They couldn't have just driven to the store, and purchased a new one, their parents would have had to get it for them.

The irony to this is that my friend, and his brother don't play Chrono Cross anymore. They like shooter games, drinking beer, and getting high all the time. (Not that there's anything wrong with that, but I would still play the game, where as they wouldn't.)

So it's possible they have both their copy, and my disc one, and they don't even use it anymore!! Or they could have sold it!! (This also happened to me once, where my neighbor borrowed my game, and his little brother sold it, not knowing it was mine...) And here I am.. 6-7 years without it and I still love the game, and would actually play it again!

I actually am not really friends with them anymore, because we just became completely different people as we got older. He started to like his other friends more than me.

Whenever I was at his house, and his other friends were there... the "cool" ones.. he'd always pay attention to them and hang out with them, while I'd be hiding in the corner playing with their dog and cat!
We used to be best friends, but if I see him on the rare occasion, it's hard for me to even say hi to him because we're so different now.

None of that matters anymore as I had ordered a new Chrono Cross game online.
It's funny though, because I ordered one and it didn't work, I got a refund and ordered another one that was a bit more expensive, that one works fortunately! After all those years, I got to play it again!

Current Events: Mystique

So if anyone is curious about the person I knew as Mystique, in October she actually asked to be friends again. She told me that she was wrong, and all of this other stuff. I was asking two of my friends about this and asking.. what should I do?
Well, I decided to give her a second chance! She feels really bad, she wants to change and wanted to be my friend again! I had no intention of talking to her again, even though I kind of wanted to.

At first everything was fine, we were talking again. But there was something different, and I even said there was something different, and it could not go back the way it used to be even before she had changed.

We actually do not talk the way we used to; we used to talk back and forth, I would be so excited to talk to her. But now it's like "Eh.. whatever".
She was actually butt-hurt when I started saying how I don't like the F word, apparently she doesn't like it when something is off topic. But I always make things off topic! You could ask me how the weather is, and I'll tell you about this one day when there was a hurricane or something... It's just how I am, I tend to talk about similar stories...
But saying I didn't like the F word when she asked about the N word, apparently set her off. I said I didn't like the N word, but I hate the F word even more. Then she said something ignorant about gay people always "throwing their sexuality", or something stupid like that.

She isn't the same person she used to be, times two, but some of the "Bad" her is still there. It's just more nonchalant.

The funny thing though, is that anytime I see her name and picture on formspring. I instantly think she made some nasty, or rude comment. I never think it's a positive one, when usually it is positive.

We actually have not really talked at all, it's just not the same anymore. I used to talk to her about everything! But now I don't talk to her at all. I used to get so excited talking to her, but now if I do talk to her, I am not excited at all, and I don't really care.
Half the time we talk, she has to say something ignorant, not necessarily offensive, but something stupid and ignorant about gay people. (Which is also ironic since she did identify as bisexual for a while)
The other half of the time everything is fine, and we do have certain things we agree on that most people would find morbid, and just a terrible way of thinking.

Before the fight, we used to be great friends. But now??? Not so much. I know she used to recommend people to follow me on formspring, and she would mention me in a good note sometimes.
But she does not do that anymore, she never talks badly about me. But never says anything to anyone like she used to. (Only one time, but only because someone asked people on formspring if they were into anime and she was like follow Firespot!)
If you know her even a little bit, it's obvious who her best friend is. But I was always like one of her second best friends, and of course since things are different now we aren't anywhere near that close anymore.
But now she has replaced me with other people, although It's understandable. I feel left out at the same time, especially since she was the one that wanted to be friends again.
She isn't really trying too hard to be my friend, and since things are not like they used to be, I guess it doesn't matter because I don't really want to be hers anymore anyways.

It's just not the same anymore and to be honest, I don't really mind. We're so disconnected now, that I do not think it will last much longer. Eventually we will be someone we used to know, but it will just have ended on a nicer note than last time.

I'm probably going to quit formspring soon anyways, so it won't matter. Although we do have each other's email, I doubt she'll even bother sending me messages, I really don't want her to anyways.

Here are links to the entire Mystique Series!
Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 3.0 - Part 4 - Part 5 - Part 6